A little less than a month ago...I graduated college. I am pumped about this accomplishment and excited to move back to my hometown but I already miss living in an apartment with my friends, laying in my bed all afternoon watching sports center once my two hours of class for the day were over, and of course...the scorching rays of sunshine on my face in Sanford stadium on a Saturday evening....
At my graduation ceremony the student speaker's speech was called "Yesterdays Students, Today's Graduates, and Tomorrow's Unemployed." How true. His advice to me was to ignore the fact that the unemployment rate is three times my GPA. I am doing just that. Until a job comes through, I am organizing my room and other fun things. Two days ago I went with my friend Rica to a giant used bookstore. It was exhilarating but the real thrill was going to this new Thai restaurant afterwards for lunch...I sat in "the rain room." I fell in love. I sat on this fancy cushion on the floor...Indian style...or let me be politically correct...I believe the board of education would like to now call it "criss-cross-applesauce." My kids will sit Indian style...because truthfully...I'm not sure the Indians have ever been offended by that phrase. Back to my story, there was rain pouring down the walls and I ate the best fried rice of my life. That's actually the end of my story.
I've been watching my cousin play basketball, spending lots of time with my sweetheart, and cooking...
Yesterday my friend and I cooked White Chicken Chili....DELICIOUS....let me give you the recipe...
boneless chicken breasts...i suppose as many as you want...I say the heartier...the better!
chopped garlic
diced onion
teaspoon of cumin
tablespoon of oregano
2 cans of white beans
and chicken stock
so yum.
AND...we made white chocolate cheesecake....
two packs of cream cheese
half a cup of sugar
bag of melted white chocolate chips
and two eggs (place them in last)
bake for 35 minutes....cool for maybe 20 and chill for hours....YUM.
well that's all I've got....that's the life of an unemployed graduate....until next time...
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
Monday, July 27, 2009
Some things you may not know about me...
I love Gerber daises.
I have an irrational fear of drains.
I drink out of the same coffee cup everyday and will continue to do so until I buy a new one that I like better.
I have random and intense urges to be running through some type of field or orchard, for instance, an apple orchard or a sunflower field (I am going to one tomorrow).
My biggest challenge is living in the present; I continuously live in the future and I am trying to change that but I find that it is hard to live in the present if you are not living for the purpose of some future goal that you have to keep in mind.
I love simplicity yet I am drawn to complication.
I cannot stay mad at anyone no matter what they have done to me.
I have seen a dozen sunsets and only one sunrise and I find that I remember endings more than I do beginnings.
I love when I am being serious and I love when I am being goofy but I hate when I am in the middle.
When I don’t know how to be myself in a situation, I over-indulge in sarcasm and I would love to find a new defense mechanism.
I hate when rain pours down as hard as it can but the second that you decide you’d like to run out into it, it stops as if it would rather you not be involved.
I want everyone in the world to know that there is at least one thing about them that is unique and irresistible and if there were not then God would not have felt a need to create them.
As long as I don’t have a test or mandatory attendance in a class, I will drive 6 or 7 hours just to see the ocean with anyone who asks me.
I love consistency but I look forward to change.
Whenever I find myself disappointed about something, I realize that it is solely because I had expectations that I never should have had.
I love burning candles but I hardly ever think of lighting them.
Of all the Disney characters, I relate most to Belle from Beauty and the Beast or Pocahontas.
I love that God created so many amazingly beautiful places on this planet but that we are only capable of being in one place at one time…perhaps we are suppose to enjoy where we are when we are?
I am constantly reminding myself that love is a choice rather than a feeling.
Finally, it was brought to my attention once by my friend Molly that the purpose of a lighthouse is to shine a light as far into the darkness as possible and if I could be any one object in the world…I would be a lighthouse
I have an irrational fear of drains.
I drink out of the same coffee cup everyday and will continue to do so until I buy a new one that I like better.
I have random and intense urges to be running through some type of field or orchard, for instance, an apple orchard or a sunflower field (I am going to one tomorrow).
My biggest challenge is living in the present; I continuously live in the future and I am trying to change that but I find that it is hard to live in the present if you are not living for the purpose of some future goal that you have to keep in mind.
I love simplicity yet I am drawn to complication.
I cannot stay mad at anyone no matter what they have done to me.
I have seen a dozen sunsets and only one sunrise and I find that I remember endings more than I do beginnings.
I love when I am being serious and I love when I am being goofy but I hate when I am in the middle.
When I don’t know how to be myself in a situation, I over-indulge in sarcasm and I would love to find a new defense mechanism.
I hate when rain pours down as hard as it can but the second that you decide you’d like to run out into it, it stops as if it would rather you not be involved.
I want everyone in the world to know that there is at least one thing about them that is unique and irresistible and if there were not then God would not have felt a need to create them.
As long as I don’t have a test or mandatory attendance in a class, I will drive 6 or 7 hours just to see the ocean with anyone who asks me.
I love consistency but I look forward to change.
Whenever I find myself disappointed about something, I realize that it is solely because I had expectations that I never should have had.
I love burning candles but I hardly ever think of lighting them.
Of all the Disney characters, I relate most to Belle from Beauty and the Beast or Pocahontas.
I love that God created so many amazingly beautiful places on this planet but that we are only capable of being in one place at one time…perhaps we are suppose to enjoy where we are when we are?
I am constantly reminding myself that love is a choice rather than a feeling.
Finally, it was brought to my attention once by my friend Molly that the purpose of a lighthouse is to shine a light as far into the darkness as possible and if I could be any one object in the world…I would be a lighthouse
Saturday, December 27, 2008
The Unexpected
For the most part we are all just floating through life. Although we never are, we feel that we are in control. We have ownership over decisions and we are inside our comfort zones unless the odds are good to go outside of them. For certain periods of time, each day will seem just like the last. Slightly different obstacles, conflicts, and different reasons to laugh. Maybe you will say something funny and people will laugh harder than you expected but other than that everything is mundane, hence, the reason why you can't always remember what you did last Thursday...because last Thursday was...nothing extraordinary or any different than...today. Sometimes though, life will twist or turn and something will catch your attention, consume your thoughts, re-focus your life. For me, decisions about the "real world" have laid heavy on my mind. My friend Rob said that the reality is that elementary school never prepares you for middle school and middle school never prepares you for high school and high school doesn't prepare you for college and does college prepare you for the real world? Nope. You realize that one day you will be in a career but it is not until the time comes to face it that you really digest it all. You realize that for the first time in your life you may remain in the same setting, same geography, same routine for far more than a mere four years. Even though it isn't until it comes that you really think about it, it is still part of the plan and it is expected. It wasn't at all the real world though that stopped me in my tracks and spun me around hard. It was the UNexpected.
I was leaving my house to drive to Atlanta last Sunday night when I came upon the scene of an accident. I think back on it so much and it seems so surreal. I thought it was my brother, same car as his, two miles (if that) from my house. I almost stopped breathing. I called my mom frantically and was yelling for her to see if he was home, and he was but I was already involved. There was no one else at the scene when I had driven by. A car had somehow run off the road and was completely demolished. I have never seen a car wrecked so badly in my life. As I parked the car and walked up, my heart felt like it was having fun with a punching bag. A man had already walked up since I drove by and was on the phone with 911. I heard him answering questions. I got a little closer to the car and a man was laid over in the front seat. His head was bleeding and there was no response to us, no movement from him. I watched him as if I were waiting for something miraculous...and I was. I thought he was dead, if not dying very quickly. I wondered who he loved and who loved him. He had what looked like a butterfly tatoo on the back of his neck and for some reason I do not think I will ever forget that tatoo as long as I live. He moved. He was sort of convulsing and I said to the guy on the phone, "he is moving, do you know he is alive?" The man kept up with his phone conversation, pacing. Another man had come up and was pacing. My biggest regret looking back on it now was that I did not go closer to him. I did not say anything comforting to him. I did not give him any company at all. I then left the scene, I was pretty sure I was going to throw up and I have no special skill so I thought I would get me and my car out of the way as other people were arriving. I prayed for about 24 hours straight from that point on and cried the whole way to Atlanta. He was alive the next day and just as soon as my hopes were up and my heart was back alive, he had passed away after having been flown to Erlanger in Chattanooga. The whole week I thought about it. I could not sleep. I was barely living in the present. I could not forget how bad the car looked and I could not forget that butterfly tattoo. I did find out a little about who loved him. He was not married but his parents are still alive and he appears to be tragically missed by them and everyone that he worked with. In relation to the things that had been on my mind about my own life, I then realized that all I can do is follow God's plan as little as it makes sense, as scary and undesirable as the road may seem, as sacrificing as it is. Isaiah 55:8 always reminds me that the Lord and I do not see eye to eye. His plans I cannot understand. I'm not sure why I came up on the scene of that accident or why I met John Hudson on the day before he died. I can only pray through things and ask the Lord to mold me to his thinking, his actions, and his ways. It is a really big prayer with some fairly UNexpected answers.
I was leaving my house to drive to Atlanta last Sunday night when I came upon the scene of an accident. I think back on it so much and it seems so surreal. I thought it was my brother, same car as his, two miles (if that) from my house. I almost stopped breathing. I called my mom frantically and was yelling for her to see if he was home, and he was but I was already involved. There was no one else at the scene when I had driven by. A car had somehow run off the road and was completely demolished. I have never seen a car wrecked so badly in my life. As I parked the car and walked up, my heart felt like it was having fun with a punching bag. A man had already walked up since I drove by and was on the phone with 911. I heard him answering questions. I got a little closer to the car and a man was laid over in the front seat. His head was bleeding and there was no response to us, no movement from him. I watched him as if I were waiting for something miraculous...and I was. I thought he was dead, if not dying very quickly. I wondered who he loved and who loved him. He had what looked like a butterfly tatoo on the back of his neck and for some reason I do not think I will ever forget that tatoo as long as I live. He moved. He was sort of convulsing and I said to the guy on the phone, "he is moving, do you know he is alive?" The man kept up with his phone conversation, pacing. Another man had come up and was pacing. My biggest regret looking back on it now was that I did not go closer to him. I did not say anything comforting to him. I did not give him any company at all. I then left the scene, I was pretty sure I was going to throw up and I have no special skill so I thought I would get me and my car out of the way as other people were arriving. I prayed for about 24 hours straight from that point on and cried the whole way to Atlanta. He was alive the next day and just as soon as my hopes were up and my heart was back alive, he had passed away after having been flown to Erlanger in Chattanooga. The whole week I thought about it. I could not sleep. I was barely living in the present. I could not forget how bad the car looked and I could not forget that butterfly tattoo. I did find out a little about who loved him. He was not married but his parents are still alive and he appears to be tragically missed by them and everyone that he worked with. In relation to the things that had been on my mind about my own life, I then realized that all I can do is follow God's plan as little as it makes sense, as scary and undesirable as the road may seem, as sacrificing as it is. Isaiah 55:8 always reminds me that the Lord and I do not see eye to eye. His plans I cannot understand. I'm not sure why I came up on the scene of that accident or why I met John Hudson on the day before he died. I can only pray through things and ask the Lord to mold me to his thinking, his actions, and his ways. It is a really big prayer with some fairly UNexpected answers.
Monday, December 15, 2008
To be like Onesiphorus
In 2 Timothy 1:16-18, Paul gives credit to the household of Onesiphorus saying:
"May the Lord show mercy to the household of Onesiphorus, because he often refreshed me and was not ashamed of my chains. On the contrary, when he was in Rome, he searched hard for me until he found me. May the Lord grant that he will find mercy from the Lord on that day! You know very well in how many ways he helped me in Ephesus."
There are many nights when I lay down to go to sleep and I shamefully realize how much of my to-do list that day was about...me. Where in our lives are we refreshing people? How are we refreshing people? Even more challenging, how are we conveying to people that we are not ashamed of their chains? How often do you spend your time searching hard for someone? In order to refresh others, we must give of ourselves and search hard for how to do so. It is only through the giving of his son Jesus that we may know God. It is only through someone's giving of themselves that you came to receive him and It is only through a combination of Jesus' sacrifice and the giving of ourselves that others may know him. I pray that we would not be ashamed of our chains or anyone else's and that we would refresh each other and search hard for each other ...as long as it is called today.
"May the Lord show mercy to the household of Onesiphorus, because he often refreshed me and was not ashamed of my chains. On the contrary, when he was in Rome, he searched hard for me until he found me. May the Lord grant that he will find mercy from the Lord on that day! You know very well in how many ways he helped me in Ephesus."
There are many nights when I lay down to go to sleep and I shamefully realize how much of my to-do list that day was about...me. Where in our lives are we refreshing people? How are we refreshing people? Even more challenging, how are we conveying to people that we are not ashamed of their chains? How often do you spend your time searching hard for someone? In order to refresh others, we must give of ourselves and search hard for how to do so. It is only through the giving of his son Jesus that we may know God. It is only through someone's giving of themselves that you came to receive him and It is only through a combination of Jesus' sacrifice and the giving of ourselves that others may know him. I pray that we would not be ashamed of our chains or anyone else's and that we would refresh each other and search hard for each other ...as long as it is called today.
Thursday, December 11, 2008
The Power of Prayer
The power of prayer is something that I have always believed in but rarely acted as if I believed in. A few times I have prayed unceasingly and even fasted for things that I desired so badly from God and he was so so so faithful each time. However, something in my human nature, I would say a mixture between sin and satan's effort, downplayed those victories on God's part, somehow watered down the glory of the moment and returned me to "real life" where many things are not answered, typically because they are not prayed for.
God gains far more glory for everything when it is asked for passionately from him. Jesus prayed passionately and effectively. Why? Because he believed when he prayed. He believed in a father, in a path, in a mission, in love. He was the son of God, his purpose and his mission were layed out clearly, no one could change it, stop it, or stand in the way. However, he still prayed. He did so diligently. He asked God for what he knew God was already bringing. Why? because God gains glory through answering requests and he gains PLEASURE through being in relationship with us. He DELIGHTS in us (Deuteronomy 30:9, Zephaniah 3:17, 1 Kings 10:9).
He is yearning for relationship with us. It should be really flattering to us. We should be humbled through this and we should give in to his desire gladly. I love how Jesus prayed. It was infinitely important that Jesus relay the message of God to the disciples, the crowds, the nations but he saw it just as important to be in prayer for his mission, for all people. He fought for prayer time. He withdrew from everyone to have consecrated time with the Lord. He also was constantly advising others to pray. It is truly incredible the role that prayer had in his life. May we pray without giving up (Luke 18:1). Let it be our goal to pray as Jesus did, passionately, consistently, as if it is the sole motivator in God's movement...because maybe it is.
God gains far more glory for everything when it is asked for passionately from him. Jesus prayed passionately and effectively. Why? Because he believed when he prayed. He believed in a father, in a path, in a mission, in love. He was the son of God, his purpose and his mission were layed out clearly, no one could change it, stop it, or stand in the way. However, he still prayed. He did so diligently. He asked God for what he knew God was already bringing. Why? because God gains glory through answering requests and he gains PLEASURE through being in relationship with us. He DELIGHTS in us (Deuteronomy 30:9, Zephaniah 3:17, 1 Kings 10:9).
He is yearning for relationship with us. It should be really flattering to us. We should be humbled through this and we should give in to his desire gladly. I love how Jesus prayed. It was infinitely important that Jesus relay the message of God to the disciples, the crowds, the nations but he saw it just as important to be in prayer for his mission, for all people. He fought for prayer time. He withdrew from everyone to have consecrated time with the Lord. He also was constantly advising others to pray. It is truly incredible the role that prayer had in his life. May we pray without giving up (Luke 18:1). Let it be our goal to pray as Jesus did, passionately, consistently, as if it is the sole motivator in God's movement...because maybe it is.
Monday, December 8, 2008
The December Challenge
This time of year, I always challenge myself to say Merry Christmas to as many strangers as possible. This is the funnest thing ever. I have said Merry Christmas to a few strangers and people just LOVE CHRISTmas cheer! Their faces brighten up and they smile and its always great to have something to smile about at work. That is really all I have to say with this blog, just to challenge you to say MERRY CHRISTMAS! Most employers cannot say Merry Christmas to you unless you say Merry Christmas to them, so brighten someones day, say MERRY CHRISTMAS!!
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Today I am Most Thankful for a Wachovia Analyst Named Chad
I would like to start this message by saying two things. First off, it's been one of those days and second, I love the Wachovia Banking institution. I am basically a walking advertisment for them and when anyone states the fact that they use another bank, I quickly turn the conversation into a debate over who is the better bank. I have had many victories. I have made countless banking errors and irresponsible decisions and wachovia has reversed them all for me with a smile. Although my loyalty to Wachovia will never change because I am NOT a fairweather fan, I did loose my cool with them a little today.
I'm sitting in my computer class at 11:15 and I decide to check my online banking to see how things are doing. I realize that on Friday I got down to $20 which is cutting it close but no big deal. I went to Kroger on Monday but forgot to deposit a check BEFORE going and so I made a small overdraft. I thought...no big...I've got overdraft protection to my savings, I will dust my self off, slap my self on the hand, and move on from this mistake. So, I check my online banking and see that I have a $245 dollar charge!!!!! WHAT?!? No one wants to find that out! I get really anxious, I'm taping my foot and counting down the seconds until class is over. I get a ride home quickly to get this mess figured out. So I call wachovia and I get the long borrrringgg man who is automated and I quickly tell him "REPRESENTATIVE," in which he says "I believe you asked for a representative, I will transfer your call." "Thank you Bob (Bob is his name because Bob is the name alloted to any mysterious, un-human, personified thing in my life)." I get on the phone with the first lady...she knows i'm frustrated and she is trying to explain to me why this is happening...she can't...I put up a fight...I'm then transferred to Donna...Donna can't explain it to me either because in her heart, she knows that the system is unfair and merciless...she transfers me to Chad. I like Chad. He explains to me why this is my fault and then takes the charge clean away.
Here is what happened so that you people may learn from my mistakes and that you may NEVER trust the banking system. I made several transactions over the Thanksgiving break, rinky-dink $5 transactions but they all posted on December the 1st and were on hold which is some weird bank thing...it can take up to 5 days...apparently. So then, on Monday (actually on December 1st) I purchace groceries...which is where I made the overdraft. All of those transactions together, some that were from up to five days ago came through yesterday. Instead of putting through the most recent one first, they charge the largest amount first (tricky and heartless) so the largest kroger transaction went through first, followed by each of the rinky-dink purchases from a week ago...and from there I was charged an overdraft fee each time up to 245 buckaroos. I told Chad that this is horribly unfair. He indirectly agrees, places me on hold, and wipes the charges. He sets me up for overdraft protection to my savings (which I had already requested months ago), he tells me to spend carefully and sends me on my way. I really like Chad. He knows in his heart that the system is inhuman and heartless, I imagine that he has a hard time waking up in the morning knowing what scandal and gut-wrenching activities the day will hold but for some reason he believes in Wachovia, stands by them, and for now...so will I.
I'm sitting in my computer class at 11:15 and I decide to check my online banking to see how things are doing. I realize that on Friday I got down to $20 which is cutting it close but no big deal. I went to Kroger on Monday but forgot to deposit a check BEFORE going and so I made a small overdraft. I thought...no big...I've got overdraft protection to my savings, I will dust my self off, slap my self on the hand, and move on from this mistake. So, I check my online banking and see that I have a $245 dollar charge!!!!! WHAT?!? No one wants to find that out! I get really anxious, I'm taping my foot and counting down the seconds until class is over. I get a ride home quickly to get this mess figured out. So I call wachovia and I get the long borrrringgg man who is automated and I quickly tell him "REPRESENTATIVE," in which he says "I believe you asked for a representative, I will transfer your call." "Thank you Bob (Bob is his name because Bob is the name alloted to any mysterious, un-human, personified thing in my life)." I get on the phone with the first lady...she knows i'm frustrated and she is trying to explain to me why this is happening...she can't...I put up a fight...I'm then transferred to Donna...Donna can't explain it to me either because in her heart, she knows that the system is unfair and merciless...she transfers me to Chad. I like Chad. He explains to me why this is my fault and then takes the charge clean away.
Here is what happened so that you people may learn from my mistakes and that you may NEVER trust the banking system. I made several transactions over the Thanksgiving break, rinky-dink $5 transactions but they all posted on December the 1st and were on hold which is some weird bank thing...it can take up to 5 days...apparently. So then, on Monday (actually on December 1st) I purchace groceries...which is where I made the overdraft. All of those transactions together, some that were from up to five days ago came through yesterday. Instead of putting through the most recent one first, they charge the largest amount first (tricky and heartless) so the largest kroger transaction went through first, followed by each of the rinky-dink purchases from a week ago...and from there I was charged an overdraft fee each time up to 245 buckaroos. I told Chad that this is horribly unfair. He indirectly agrees, places me on hold, and wipes the charges. He sets me up for overdraft protection to my savings (which I had already requested months ago), he tells me to spend carefully and sends me on my way. I really like Chad. He knows in his heart that the system is inhuman and heartless, I imagine that he has a hard time waking up in the morning knowing what scandal and gut-wrenching activities the day will hold but for some reason he believes in Wachovia, stands by them, and for now...so will I.
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